Since the pandemic began, my Instagram feed has been filled with face workouts and face tools. Every other scroll, I see someone gua sha–ing their face for a lymphatic massage, or another blowing their cheeks Dizzy Gillespie–style to work their muscles. Then there are all the tools that are marketed towards me: a tiny gilded piece that looks like a paint roller with spikes, a micro-current tool that resembles a sex toy and sends shocks through the skin to tone muscles, and a thin metal stick with a ball at the end to stimulate different muscles as an exercise of facial reflexology and detox. The before-and-afters are particularly mesmerizing: nasolabial folds are lifted, undereye bags are gone, and jowls are smoothed. Call...
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